Skip to main content

When The Mourning Comes

What is pain? The dictionary defines pain as “physical suffering or discomfort caused by illness or injury.” I’m sure they’re right with that definition but I know first-hand what pain feels like. Have you ever mourned someone who was still alive? That is pain! It’s almost indescribable and it hurts far more than one could ever imagine. To say goodbye to a person or relationship you thought you’d have for the long haul brings a hurt like none other.

Mourning someone who’s still alive and grieving over what use to be doesn’t go away overnight. It sticks with you. It rides your back day in and day out. It’s the song on the radio that reminds you of that person you use to share everything with. It’s staying awake at night while everyone else is asleep, trying to figure out when things started to fall apart. It’s a memory that hits you randomly and you just let the tears fall because none of it makes sense.  When the mourning comes, there’s nothing you can do but take things one minute at a time. It’s funny how long forever really last. To hear the same person tell you they love you yet cause a hurt like this is one big contradiction.

Things won’t be this way forever. Eventually the phone will ring and you’ll send the call to voicemail.  You’ll look up and realize that so much time has gone by and you’ve enjoyed the time alone. You’ll appreciate the time you got reconnect with your very own self and figure out what it is you want out of relationships and what you won’t for stand for again.

As crazy as it sounds, there’s someone out there praying they get the chance to meet you. Everything that wasn’t good enough for the one who caused your mourning will bring someone else so much joy. There’s levels to this and there’s no fast forward button to save you heartache. You’ve got to push your way through it. You’ve gotta smile when you feel like crying and keep pushing when everything in you tells you, you can’t make it without them. When the mourning comes, keep your head up because there’s nothing wrong with finding out that you’re not meant for someone. Better sooner than later right?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Why Are You Single?

As I'm sitting at work chatting with coworkers about life, I get asked the dreadful question. Breezy, why are you single? I wish I had some profound text book answer for them or hell, five dollars for every time I was asked by people in general. The answer is simple. I just wont settle! Being a single mother dating in 2018 is as complicated as trying to read Mike Tysons lips with your tv muted. Although I’ve struggled with self-image in the past, I’m in a much better place mentally and physically and know my worth. That alone is a powerful weapon. I often look at my friends and family members and think to myself….am I really the only one who doesn’t have a significant other? When will it be my season?
As quickly as those thoughts creep into my head I try to shake them away with positive affirmations. See, I grew up in the church and understand that there’s power of life and death in the tongue. My prayers for my future husband are very detailed and I know deep down, the man that h…

Just So You Know

Time is such a precious thing. As a single mom in my late 20s, I’m very selective in how I choose to spend my time. When it comes to dating, there’s a few things I’d like men to understand. Dating a single mom isn’t a science. It’s actually common sense. Below are some of the most important things I need my future prospect to grasp before asking me out…
We’re A Package Deal- My son is my world. You can’t have me without having him. It’s been the two of us for the last seven years. He’s extremely bright and picks up on bull fairly quicklyso I feed off of him as well. Not only are you dating me, but you’re dating us.If you can’t see yourself taking family trips, having family game night, or watching cartoons then we’re not for you honey.
Your Intentions Must Be Clear – As we’re getting to know each other understand that your actions must match your words. To be honest I am not interested in friendships being this close to 30. I have work friends, family friends and patient friends. That’…

Don't Be So Negative

I look at myself as being a pretty darn good mother in general. Society created the label of “single” mothers. Since when did my relationship status have anything to do with my parenting skills? Whether I had a partner or not, the values I instill in my son would be the same. I think they’re e a lot of misconceptions that people have about single mothers in general. Why can’t we just be great at raising our children? Are we allowing these negative connotations to dictate what we’re capable of?
As a single mother, I wish society would understand that we’re some of the strongest human beings ever. People that play multiple roles at once usually get paid big bucks to perform. I can assure you though that I’m no Tyler Perry nor Eddie Murphy and I take my payments for performing in mommy I love yous and sticky-face kisses. We had the choice to take the easier way out and continue with our lives but we chose to do what was right and take care of our responsibility. Just because we’re single …